Laura Smith

Hi Emma and welcome to unsung stories. Thank you so much for joining us.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Hello. I'm excited to be here today.

 

Laura Smith

Great to have you. I just said that our listeners can get to know you a little more. Could you tell us a bit about yourself and what family life looks like for you?

 

Emma Allen-Baker

So my name is Emma. As you said, and I'm married to Matt. And we've been married for almost four years. And we're both emergency nurses at a very big Regional Hospital. And so that means we're shift workers. So each week looks a little different for us. I'm a mama to a 17 month old little boy named Alfie. And a second little human who's coming in August.

 

Laura Smith

Aww, that's so exciting. Congratulations.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Thank you.

 

Laura Smith

So that all sounds like a little bit of a juggling act, especially, you know, different shifts each week. How do you go about prioritizing your relationship with God during the season?

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Yeah, I feel like the term juggling act understatement. I really had to learn, I think how to make use of the really small moments in my day, to be able to prioritize my relationship with God. So for me that looks like when I'm walking home with the program are following Alfie around the backyard, I will often listen to Christian podcasts at spermy on, I find it really helpful hearing from other Christian mums, as it encourages me, just to keep going as a Christian and to make most of this season, as I think can be really hard. When you're in those really nitty gritty moments. You feel like you're the only one. But podcasts really helped me remember that it's not just me and to be encouraged.

 

Laura Smith

That's really good. What's what favorite podcasts do you like listening to that help you do that?

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Yeah, definitely. So that's what I've listened to. I also listened to Risen Motherhood and one called Mums Group.

 

Laura Smith

ooo I love podcasts. I've not heard of that. So I'm gonna have a look.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Yeah, so mums groups from like another Aussie Australian mum. And they just kind of talk about different topics, and how they tackle them as Christian mum. So it's really, really cool. Yeah. And so I guess another way that I try to prioritize that my relationship with God during the season is trying to be intentional being regular church. But to be completely honest, that's really hard for our family to do at times. So getting my entire family unit to church on a regular basis is like a when we get so excited, every time we're on we're going. And that's because between one of us working on a Sunday sometimes or we're just being in like the rotation of daycare sicknesses that have been coming home. And with COVID, not being able to go to church being sick. It's been a real challenge. And then once we're at church, it can be often really frustrating at times, because I find it really hard to listen to the sermon. And that's because I'm chasing Alfie around most of the sermon. And it's actually funny because I remember when Alfie was little and stationary, I used to think all this whole mum church thing is so easy. And then he started moving. And I was like, Oh, I can't eat any of the seminal write notes anymore. So wise older woman actually suggested listening to the sermons during the week, if I haven't heard much of them on a Sunday. So me doing that, I find it really helpful. And then if both me and my husband at church will often take turns watching Alfie, so like one week on one of my golf, and that's been working really well. I've also been through reading, and I find that that's a really helpful way to prioritize my relationship with God. So I find reading Christian books really helpful. But I have discovered that they need to be short chapter books. Otherwise, I don't stay awake. So I tried to do that in the evening when athletes in bed instead of watching Netflix, for example. And that's we had to be an intentional change the some of the nights during my week. And then if me and my husband are both home, we try to read a Christian book, 10 minutes before bed when we're both home. And that's been really helpful as I find in just a little bit at a time goes a long way. In prioritizing. Yeah, just learning more about God.

 

Laura Smith

Hmm. I have to say, I'm a bit similar. So I found Christian books really helpful. Yeah. And I really liked what you said about like, it's been an intentional change to watching Netflix

 

Emma Allen-Baker

100%

 

Laura Smith

and I found audible really, really helpful. So yes, and I don't have capacity. Even if I have the physical book. Sometimes you get to the end of the day and you're so tired, but even just listening to it in my ears, and being intentional with what I'm listening to. Or just listening in the car along the way. That sort of thing.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Yeah, definitely Yeah, I love Audible for the car, it's really, really good.

 

Laura Smith

So how do you feel like your relationship with God has changed since you became a mum? So kind of what was it like before? And what's it like now?

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Yes, I think before becoming a mum, I don't think I really ever knew what it meant to truly, to come to the end of myself, if that makes sense. So I think I've had to learn how to lean on God and depend on him a lot more. So since having our fee, I've definitely struggled with anxiety surrounding his health. And I think that's because being an ad nurse, I think all nurses might better relate to this little bit. I've seen a lot of grieving families like right there in front of me. And I think that's really made the idea of unexpected loss of a loved one, really tangible. So I've really had to entrust my children and even my husband to God, and I'm not perfect at it. And there's a lot of there's been a lot of tears. And it's not like I just one day made the decision and click my fingers. And I just could trust God fully with it. So I've really had to pray. And when something really sparks me about worrying about Alfie or my husband, I've really had to learn to pray about it. I have to really intentionally learn to pray about it, and not just go into that I almost go into this state of like, preemptively grieving, like, I'm just like, I'm feeling what I have seen so tangible in front of me. So having to trust God, that He has a plan for my children and my husband's life, really, really depend on him. And that, yeah, I think it's been really humbling for me definitely change in that way. I have to trust it, he has a plan and that his plan is better than what my good plan is. And just getting my head around that. And that what I think's best for my family may not be what God thinks best. But that means I have to trust Him, and lean on him. So that's been a huge change.

 

Laura Smith

So that's a pretty radical example that you're talking about. But I think we carry it on right down to you know, you can falling over at the playground or exactly things in life.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Yeah, like children not wanting to sleep. And like, why is that? Why is it a good plan right now for me that my child doesn't want to sleep for weeks on end?

 

Laura Smith

Yes. Yes. Its entrusting them to God.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Exactly. And I think that's been really humbling. Again, in my frustrations as a mum, my my exhaustion as well, like, particularly when things aren't going the way I'd want it to go. So for example, like I said, my child not sleeping, or the messy house staring back at me, and I'm exhausted, I've had to realize that the circumstances that I'm in the circumstances that God has given me, and I've had to preach to myself that I'm not God, and that he is God. And that is good. And then he's still sitting on his throne in those frustrations and those moments of exhaustion.

 

Laura Smith

So what have you found the most helpful way for you to read the Bible? So do you use a study guide or a study method? Or do you just pick it up and read it when you can?

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Yeah, so at the moment, I'm finding the use of audio forms the best. So I've been following this one year praying to the Bible for your kids book by Nancy Guthrie. So she gives like, quite lengthy passages to read each day, sitting down and actually reading them. I don't find super practical, but I find listening to them on an audio Bible on my phone the best as I can listen to it, sometimes why I chop something or why clean? Well, even if I am sitting, it just seems a lot easier to do. And it just seems a lot more. What's the word I'm looking for? achievable, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. So then I then read the devotion that she's got. And then I pray. And some days, if I don't, don't have the time, really to do all the passages, I'll just read the devotion and pray. And I find that really, really helpful. I also have found using, there's an app called prayer mate. And I really love it for praying intentionally, because I find that I'm praying regularly for myself and my friends and my family and the wider world in a structured way. And I find it really easy to update. So I like that if a friend says to me, I'm really struggling with this. Can you pray for me? I can actually put it straight into my phone and that way, it'll rotate through then the name will come up eventually. And I will pray for it. And that way, I'm actually intentional.

 

Laura Smith

Yeah, that's great. Yeah, that's, that's called prayer mate.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Yeah, Prayer Mate. It's a free app. Yeah. Cool. Really, really good.

 

Laura Smith

I'll just jump in here. Listening because we've mentioned a fair few resources tonight on our website on unsungstoriespodcast.com. We have a episode packed And I'll put all of this information up in the show notes. Check the link on whatever device you're listening to, because I should remember what the URL is! So has there been anything that's been a struggle in your spending time with God?

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Yeah, I think just consistency. Like even this week, that's just gone. I probably have read my Bible once. So I think my consistency just ebbs and flows. Because I find that evening, so exhausting, but the mornings are not as practical. Or I'm getting up at, you know, 6am to be at work at seven. So my mornings at work. Yeah. And then when I'm at home with Alfie is trying to rip out the pages of my Bible. And then also just I have found at times social media and technology, often, they just distract me from making time we've got a priority. So so much easier to scroll on Facebook than it is to sit and intentionally think about the Bible. So having to make an intentional decisions to not be on technology has been a struggle.

 

Laura Smith

Great. Thanks for being honest there.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Thats all right.

 

Laura Smith

So what's something that's really grown you as a Christian in motherhood? Hmm. Yeah. So this is a hard one, because I think how I've been grown in so many ways, I found fellowship with other Christian mums to really grow me my walk with God. I've got two Christian mums, in particular, who've just been so wonderful. It's just been so encouraging to walk alongside each other, and share the realities of motherhood together, including the highs and the lows. And this has actually really helped me to learn how to humble myself. And that's because firstly, it's been a lesson in envy, for example, like comparing how my child is sleeping, compared to one how one of their kids is sleeping. So I've had to learn to trust God with my circumstances. And in doing that, I've had to really learn to be truly happy for my mum, friend, when they're celebrating the small wins in their motherhood journey that I might be currently struggling with. also been really humbling in walking alongside mums who don't pretend to have it all together. And just sharing the realities of what being a mum and being a Christian mum is like, and why we need Jesus more and more each day, just being so vulnerable with one another, has just allowed so much room for encouragement, and for joy and for prayer. And I am just so grateful that I've been able to walk alongside them in such a vulnerable way, and share life with them. I think it's just above me on as a Christian mum to keep enduring and to keep trusting God. So how would you encourage the mum who loves Jesus, but is feeling distant in this season?

 

Emma Allen-Baker

I've actually been reading a book recently. And it's called For The Joy. It's a Australian book. In this book, there's one mum in it that sums up what I would want to say to a mum struggling and feeling distant from God. So if it's okay, I'd like to read that because it's really encouraged me and I think it could encourage others. So a little context, this book is written by a bunch of different missionary mums. And in this section, this mums called Jessica and she sums up what is called her Confessions of a not so perfect missionary mum. So she says, "Bible study and prayer are not the fruit of the Spirit, nor are they measures of one's spirituality. I think it's a little ordinary, everyday moments that reveal to us and to others what it means to be a Christian. How do we respond to sick or grizzley children, to stingy or spendthrift husbands, to snarling traffic? How do we respond to tripping over toys not put away, to wasted it unwanted dinners to define bad behavior? Am I loving, peaceful, patient kind, faithful, gentle, good and self controlled? Our children learn from us all day how to be and do not just in the minutes that we spend reading the Bible and praying." And then she sums up and this is my favorite bit, "I will continue to run and continue to stumble. Because you need to get back up again and keep trying, all by the grace of God who loves me." And I found that so encouraging. I read that last bit or by the grace of God who loves me, even when I'm stumbling and trying

 

Laura Smith

and we'll just get back up. Yep. How's your reading? I'm like, Oh, here we go. Yes, I'm not been doing I've not been good at that lately. Yeah. Gotta keep getting back up.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

I feel exactly the same. I remember the first time I read that I like I'm pretty sure I cried. It's just such a reminder that the measure of my motherhood is not by how much time I spend in the Bible with my kid. But about those moments and reflecting Christ back to them, even when I fail at doing that, and it's gonna be messy. But just a reminder to continue to lean on God's grace to run that race with endurance and with hope,

 

Laura Smith

and how much that is such an integral part of living out a Christian life, like even at the beginning. I liked what she said about like Bible study and, and all of that isn't a measure of our spirituality. When so often it's so easy to go. "Oh, yeah, I've been reading my Bible or whatever", like I'm taking the box of Yeah, spiritual. But in fact, if I'm not living it out, it's not important. Like Yeah, anyway.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

Exactly. And like Bible study and prayer, such good things, but it's like that head heart hands analogy. I think it is like your reading and learning in your head, but if it's not changing your heart and going out into your actions. Yeah, this is so challenging and encouraging. Yeah. So I find that so encouraging, because it reminds me that the measure of my motherhood is not by how much time I spend in the Bible with Alfie, but rather, it's the everyday moments reflecting Christ back to him. And it's gonna be really messy. But I found that so encouraging because it will continue. It reminds me to continue to lean on God's grace to run the race with endurance and hope.

 

Laura Smith

That's beautiful.

 

Emma Allen-Baker

So do you, Lord, we are just so thankful for the blessing of motherhood, even in the moments where it feels like a burden. Lord, help us to be grateful for this blessing and the season that we are in. Help us to trust you in the hard parts of motherhood, and to remember that you are still on your throne despite how we might feel, help us and not put on a show to act like we have it all together. And maybe we be vulnerable with each other and encourage each other. Help us to run the race within durance putting our children to you even though we may fail many times to do this. Well. Lord, help us to humble ourselves. seek forgiveness when we fail, and to remember your grace until your kingdom comes. Amen. Amen.